We have a printer!!! A printer who loves us for who we are, accepts us for our potty mouth and dirty pictures, and promises to stay by our side unconditionally. As long as we pay on time. Just like a real relationship, except for the paying on time bit. I usually get a seven-day grace period for late relationship payments, but I think that’s just because I have really good credit.
Anyway, we are finally finalizing the September issue and it should be to the printers by Wednesday, putting it in your homes starting September 9th-ish. Then, over the next few months, we’ll slowly bump up print dates so that the issues get to you by the 1st of the month. The new printer should hopefully take care of some of the distribution issues we’ve been having, too. And then I won’t have to go apeshit on poor, innocent Greeks on dropzone.com who post about magazine delivery times.
So thanks to everyone for your patience! And, if you STILL don’t have your August issue yet, e-mail email@example.com and please accept our apologies; mailmen around the world are enjoying our magazine so much that they just don’t want to give it up, apparently.
We hope you like issue #3—we have a guide to jumping with fruit by Simon Bones, a vicious Summerfest YouTube smack-down, a starter’s guide to speed flying for skydivers, SkyGod’s monthly edicts, another juicy “No Shit” story and hopefully enough boobs and butts to make it worthwhile to have gotten kicked out of a printer. Please, please, please give us your honest feedback on what you like, what you don’t, what you miss and what you want; we’re working on some easier feedback forms here on the website so hopefully it’ll be a snap to send us your thoughts. In the meantime, e-mail us at firstname.lastname@example.org with your feedback, dreams, hopes and desires. We’ll do what we can to make the magazine-related ones come true.