Once upon a time, there lived a poor little peasant boy by the name of Phunnel. Phunnel was born and raised in a little Village called Dirtside in a land known as Phucked. As you can imagine, Phucked was not exactly a great place to grow up, or to be particularly happy, and for as long as Phunnel could remember, all he wanted was a way to a better life.
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